We need to boot this fluorescent nightmare to the kerb
WE'VE lost our way, Australia. We've allowed our kids too much leniency for far too long and it's time we do something about it.
I speak, of course, of footy boots.
I was shopping around the other day for a new pair of football boots that reflected my personality. That is to say, I was looking for plain boots with absolutely nothing flashy about them.
In fact, if it were possible for my football boots to bore people to tears, it would be ideal for me.
However, I was mildly distraught to find the plain black footy boots of yesteryear have been replaced by fluoro nightmares so hideous even the cast of Home and Away in the '80s would have thought them over the top.
Those of you who know me would know I'm all for individual expression, but this is simply a step too far, and it's setting a dangerous (not actually all that dangerous) precedent for our young'uns.
Back in the day (yes, I'm aware I'm 26), you were considered to have the ego of a small planet if you turned up for training in boots brighter than the collective IQ of the team.
It was seen as a sign that the person wearing the flashy boots thought they were God's gift to the footy ground.
It was saying to the world, "Yes, I haven't earned this, but I think I'm the best damned player in the state".
However, it now appears flashy is the norm rather than the exception.
So what happens if all the kids are running around with flashy boots and somebody rocks up with plain black boots?
Do the flashy kids think the kid with the plain boots is some sort of footballing hipster doofus?
Don't get me wrong, you do still see the plain old black boots around the place, but they're becoming an endangered species.
It goes to a broader point though.
For example, the other day I saw an outlet selling vacuum cleaners with different, vibrant colours.
They were using the colours of the vacuum cleaners as a selling point, as they would if they were iPods.
Yes, vacuum cleaners.
Have we become so superficial that we are simply prioritising form over function?
Something to chew on.